For Love or Vice
by Brass Dragon
Summary: "You told my team I was too busy to get laid?"--Iruka tries to explain to the next generation the meaning and application of vice.
1. Chapter 1

**For Love or Vice**

**The Profligacy **_of ninja life_

_By the Brass Dragon_

_**Chapter 1; **__Evidence of Degeneracy_

Humming lightly, totally content with the rest of the world, Kakashi sat beneath a young gingko tree; eyes glued to the pages before him. The cover, outlandishly garish against the fall scenery, proclaimed his distraction to the world. The very picture of the man itself could be (and to one industrious author was) fabulous advertisement. The by-line would scream: _Look! Its lovely, and naughty, and perhaps morally apprehensible…but _he's _doing it! And in public no less. Whatever is keeping you from indulging in the privacy of your own home?_

Truth be told, the sight of the jounin so pleased with said book had significantly upped the fan base.

Naruto scowled, lips pursed and starred down the path at the supine figure that was Kakashi-sensei.

"Naruto?" Sakura queried as she made her way to the boy. "What is it?"

"Kakashi-sensei…" He all but growled.

Sea green eyes scanned the landscape, before latching onto the silvery head. "Yeah?" She drawled. "What about him?"

"That book…" He muttered.

"Yeah?"

"Don't you ever wonder? About those books?"

"Ehh?"

* * *

Iruka was tossing pieces of slightly stale bread to a small flock of world weary pigeons. He was leaning comfortably against a rock wall and waiting for his dinner companion; whom he heard long before he saw.

"I'm serious! Maybe they're _code_ or something!"

"No way Naruto! They're smut, and he's a dirty pervert."

"Comm'on Sakura-chan!"

"You are so full of it." She muttered pushing hair off of her face. "Hey sensei." She greeted with a little wave.

"Sakura-chan." He said with a smile. "How did the mission go?"

Naruto snorted. "Turns out Sasuke's allergic to really old dust."

"Naruto!" Sakura scolded.

"What?" I didn't say anything bad. I didn't even call him snot face again."

"You just did." She ground out, little fists balled up in anger.

"Eh…heh heh." To his credit he did look mildly chagrinned. "Oops?"

Iruka's hand threaded through spiky yellow strands, and rumpled affectionately. "Sakura-chan, would you like to join us for dinner? My treat."

She seemed slightly taken aback, but grinned. "Yeah. Thanks sensei."

"Not a problem." He said with genuine pleasure, resting a hand on each of their shoulders and gently steering the in the direction of the restaurant.

"Iruka-sensei? Isn't the ramen…Iruka-sensei?"

* * *

Sakura sighed happily and sipped at her tea. The restaurant was quiet, dim and smelled deliciously like ginger and grilling beef. "I've never eaten here before." She commented looking up at Iruka. "Do you come here a lot?"

He smiled, slowly turning his cup on the table. "Every so often. One of my students this term, her family owns the place. She shares her lunch form time to time to remind me that there's more to life than just ramen."

Grinning she shook her head. "Don't let Naruto hear you say that."

Iruka laughed softly nodding and Sakura was suddenly swallowing back a wave of nostalgia. She could remember sharing a few lunches with him at the academy, and giggling with the other girls as he demonstrated proper form and various taijutsu moves. Sighting wistfully she poured them both more tea.

"Eh? The food isn't here yet?" Naruto asked, sliding onto the short bench and pouting. "I can't believe ramen wasn't anywhere on the menu." He muttered, glaring in the kitchens general direction.

Sakura shot Iruka an inquisitive look, brow arched as if to ask; _"What'd I tell you?"_

_

* * *

  
_

The next morning was pleasantly warm, and Kakashi took his time wandering in a roundabout route to the appointed training field. Patting his weapons pouch he grinned blissfully. Today was going to be a good day.

He came to the clearing to find Naruto trying to juggle the dull practice shuriken and Sakura yelling out helpful encouragement. Sasuke was Brooding Morosely Ô beneath a tree, periodically swiping at his nose with a rumpled tissue.

As he crossed his arms and stepped into view Sakura stood looking at him expectantly, Naruto quickly leapt out of range of multiple falling shuriken, and Sasuke glared halfheartedly before sneezing wetly.

Failing to suppress the _'icky'_ face, he turned to the two with significantly less snot. "Have you been practicing?"

Sakura grinned and nodded while Naruto frowned, crossing his arms petulantly. "Ah. Well." Letting his hand rest on Sakura's head he grinned. "As I expected." The girl was trying very hard not to preen happily, and Kakashi chuckled patting at her pink hair much like he would one of his dogs. "Sakura-chan, your mission today…is to throw things at Naruto." The blond groaned softly and tried very hard not to watch Sakura bounce gleefully.

"You don't have to be so _happy _about it." He mumbled.

"Whad aboud be?"

Kakashi stilled, blinking, before turning to look down at Sasuke. "What?"

"Die said, whad aboud be?" The congested little snot faucet demanded.

Naruto giggled into his hands as Kakashi scratched the back of his head.

"Oh!" Sakura gasped, turning to dash towards her bag, and routing inside it frantically. She withdrew a dark wrapped package and offered it triumphantly to the stuffy boy.

"Whad id it?" He asked, making no move to take it.

Her smile dimmed a bit, but she pushed it into his hands. "I told Iruka-sensei about our mission yesterday, and he gave me some tea to give to you. He said you'd had it before, he said to tell you that drinking it in a hot bath will clear your congestion faster." She flushed delicately and took a deep breath, waiting for his reaction.

Sasuke's hands clenched around the tea, as if Sakura would try to take it back. Nodding he turned and walked away.

They watched him amble over the trail. "Okay." Kakashi breathed, relieved that he wouldn't have to listen to him sniffle for the next hour or two. "Naruto, gather some rocks and things for Sakura to heave at you." He hopped onto a wide tree limb and fumbled behind his back for his book. "Remember, focus your chakra and push out to deflect. Think of air jets in a hot tub." Wiggling he made himself comfortable, and flipped to a marked page.

When he didn't hear his students moving to begin, he looked down; and found them watching him curiously. "Uh. What?"

"Soo. You're just going to read then?" Naruto drawled questioningly.

"Yes. Is that a problem?" Kakashi demanded, wondering what had gotten into them.

"Of course not." Sakura soothed, waving a hand while Naruto shook his head reassuringly.

A tingling rush called _suspicion _trilled up the jounin's spine, and he rolled abruptly out of the tree and landed in a crouch; face to face with the traitors disguised as two thirds of his team.

"Of course not." He repeated, thoughtful.

"No, of course not. But you're almost done with that one." Sakura pointed out with a smile.

Kakashi lifted his hand, and noted that yes; the spot his finger held was very close to the end of the back cover. Turning his one eye back to the pair he pointedly raised one brow.

"Yeah." Naruto agreed with a frown. "Is the next one out? Do you have it at home?"

"Yes, I got a bit behind. There were a few missions the last couple of weeks and…" Shaking his head sharply he shut the book and carefully put it away. That done he crossed his arms and stared down at the soon to be discovered doppelgangers. "What the hell is going on?"

* * *

Iruka was pushing papers at the mission desk…literally. He slowly and carefully shoved a sheaf of papers in front of Kotetsu, who would slowly and carefully push them back. Frowning he blew a loose clump of hair out of his face; this was going to take decisive action.

Shoving the papers swiftly over he stood and smiled politely, "Oh Kotetsu-san, you're the one taking care of the daimyo's lovely niece today? Have those missives arrived yet?" The _'lovely'_ woman perked up from her seat in the back of the large room, where she had taken up residence for the past six days.

Kotetsu froze and turned wide frantic eyes up to the teacher. "Irukaaa." He pleaded quietly.

Iruka gave him a sympathetic look, and leaned down to speak quietly. "I've been dealing with a classroom full of snot nosed allergy ridden eight year olds. A few of them which have inexplicable rashes…you are _not _pawning this off on me."

Tense hands clenched the much abused papers, and the man indulged in a whimper, but bravely suppressed the pout.

Iruka softened a bit and placed a reassuring hand on the man's shoulder. "I'll buy you lunch tomorrow." Kotetsu grumbled a bit but nodded before rising and walking around the desk.

Grinning Iruka rearranged some scrolls, and bit his lip to keep from chuckling. "That was cold sensei."

Freezing guiltily, he sheepishly glanced upwards. "Ah, what's that Genma-san?"

Teeth clinking on the senbon, Genma gestured with his chin. The daimyo's whip thin, narrow faced niece was whispering fiercely and jabbing a long spindly finger at the papering in Kotetsu's hands.

Sighing, Iruka rose. "I should go over there."

"Nah." Genma said grinning. "He's the one who wanted to work the desk. Let him handle it. It'll help."

"Help?" A scarred nose wrinkled curiously. "Help how?"

"You know…" Genma made a swirling all encompassing gesture with one hand. "To grow."

"Grow?" Iruka was beginning to get a sneaking suspicion that Genma had no idea what he was talking about.

"Uh-huh." He nodded, tongue-ing the needle. "You know…emotionally."

Biting his lip, Iruka nodded, shoulders shaking with suppressed laughter. "Of course. I'd never presume to stand in the way of something as important as emotional growth."

Genma grinned, and hopped up to perch on the table. Iruka frowned but kept quiet. When one hand reached for the assignment roster, the sensei swiftly smacked it away with the backs of his fingers. "Ow." Genma pouted, senbon tilting down in exaggerated hurt.

"Iruka-sensei."

"Asuma-san. How can I help you?"

The man stepped the rest of the way to the desk and leaned heavily. He slid a bundle of wrinkled, mud splattered papers across the surface and Iruka immediately began flipping through, checking for pertinent information. Asuma remained tense, leaning over the desk and watching the academy teacher closely.

When the last page was reached, and the small stamp of approval stamped, he seemed to relax. Iruka sorted through a pile of scrolls until he found the correct one, and made a note of the completed assignment. Writing in his careful precise hand, he didn't look up as he spoke; "Just how much did you pay Shikamaru-kun to write your report for you?"

The larger man jerked in surprise, and Genma was fairly certain he heard a guilty '_eep' _escape his mouth. "Enough." He grumbled, scratching his chin in reproach. "Eh. Sorry?" His hand migrated up his jaw as he fought the urge to grovel.

Iruka's wide brown eyes studied him, and his back stiffened as he waited for that disappointed little sigh-and-head-shake-combo. But instead he got a chuckle and a wave of one tanned hand. "You're sorry? Don't be, I'm just happy that this thing is legible. And you're the one who paid. I think you got the raw end of the deal on this one." He grinned conspiratorially, "Shikamaru-kun tends to _over_estimate the worth of his services."

Asuma sighed heavily and leaned a hip against the desk. "Tell me about it." He groaned.

Genma was sniggering when Kakashi came in. Tuning out Asuma and Iruka's conversation, he watched him look around the room _searching_ for something, and then watched him walk _purposefully_ towards the desk.

"Hey." He said in way of greeting the copy-nin as he approached the table, and was subsequently ignored as the man lightly placed his hands on the desktop and leaned towards Iruka. Genma and Asuma shared an inquisitive look over Kakashi's back.

"Kakashi-sensei?" The chunin asked leaning back slightly.

"You told my team I was to busy to get laid?" He demanded, his one visible eye narrowed slightly.

"Eh?!" Iruka countered eloquently, clearly confused. "What are you talking about?"

Kakashi slumped and heaved a world weary sigh. "Just what did you tell Sakura and Naruto last night that made them so interested in my personal life?"

Iruka's nose wrinkled and he groaned. "I should have known better than to try to explain something like that to Naruto." Dropping his head into his hands to hide his embarrassment, he wondered how best to explain the situation. "Naruto was speculating over the possibility that your books were…something _more._"

"What? More what?" Kakashi asked.

"Well, like in code or something."

"Code." Genma scoffed, swallowing back the urge to laugh.

"Sakura was proclaiming that you were nothing more than a pervert, and getting forceful about it. And…well…"

* * *

Naruto, as per normal, had shoved his food down his throat in truly a fantastic example of ninja swiftness. "No really. Just hear me out!"

Sakura sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose, as if to ward of an oncoming headache. "I've heard you out, and I still say you're grasping. He's a filthy pervert!"

Iruka winced at the volume, casting his eye around the nearly vacant restaurant, but kept quiet and looked to Naruto for his retort.

"Nuh-uh. I bet they have tons of jutsus and survival tactics and stuff. But people only ever see the dirty bits. Oo! I bet it's a genjutsu!"

"Naruto! He's just a dirty lecher!"

Crossing his arms, the boy narrowed his eyes and glared. "Yeah, sure. Way to see underneath the underneath there Sakura-chan."

"What?!"

"Now, now." Iruka soothed, gaining their attention. "Stop this. There's a perfectly good reason why your sensei reads those books." He knew he had them now. Sakura wanted desperately to find some redeeming quality in Kakashi, to prove that putting up with the chronically late genius wasn't in vain. Naruto wanted desperately to be right.

"Vice?" Asuma asked tilting his head like a curious puppy.

"Yes." Iruka confirmed. "I told them that ninja, especially ninja as skilled as jounin, had numerous vices."

"You've seen what skilled ninja have to accomplish, what they go through when they leave on missions, right?" Both nodded, sitting side by side on a rickety looking park bench. "You both have your little idiosyncrasies too. These will grow and change as you get older, and you'll find that there are certain things that you like to indulge in. and whether these things are splurging on numerous bowls of ramen, or reading material that is illegal to sell to those under the age of 18, that's your prerogative."

Sakura looked thoughtful. "Soo, Tsunade-sama's gambling is her vice?"

Iruka nodded. "Yes, that is a good example."

"But isn't that bad?" Naruto asked looking confused. "She gets into trouble and dept and stuff."

"Ah, well." Scratching his nose, he sighed. "Vices aren't always the best for you, or the most healthy. But we're ninja, and the more skilled a ninja you are, or the higher rank you become the more your life is put into danger on even a daily basis. Shinobi have a heightened sense of mortality, and may indulge in harmful vices simply because they bring them so much joy. Maybe…maybe they figure that they're not going to live all that long anyway and they would rather do the things that they desire to do."

Sakura tapped her chin idly, "So Kakashi-sensei reads those pervy books because he actually enjoys them?"

Iruka flushed a bit. "Ah. More than likely. You have to remember that Kakashi-sensei is, and always has been a very busy man." Struggling around the point that he wanted to make, he flushed even more deeply. "I have to imagine that he tends to live a bit vicariously through fiction. Maybe finding situations in his books that he would like to actually physically indulge in, but has never had the time."

Two sets of eyes blinked up at him and Iruka mentally groaned.

"Well." Sakura breathed. "I suppose reading is better then the alternative." She shuddered a bit at the thought of Kakashi being outwardly lecherous.

Iruka crossed his arms. "You have to admit, those books portray a certain stereotype. You'd never imagine that someone who lazed around engrossed in them would be so talented."

"Yeah." Naruto agreed grudgingly, still disappointed that the garish covers didn't contain secrets of the trade.

* * *

All three jounin blinked down at a flushed Iruka.

"Huh." Genma breathed. "I guess I never really thought about it."

"When you do it's all fairly obvious. Kakashi-sensei has his books, Asuma-sensei his cigarettes, Raido-san his…OCD. Genma-san…well, we all know what Genma-san does." Iruka finished with a slight huff, as Genma leered around his needle. "The Godaime-sama has her gambling and such, Shizune-san keeps after Godaime-sama. Jiraiya-sama has his women and Sandaime-sama had his little voyeuristic tendencies." It was said so matter of fact-ly that everyone nodded in agreement before catching the last bit of information.

"Um. What?" Kakashi asked somewhat uneasily.

"Voyeuristic…" Asuma drawled, looking pale as he fiddled with an unlit cigarette.

Iruka gave them an innocent little nod, and then caught sight of Genma's leer. "Oh. No no no. Not like that. I mean not most of the time. Maybe a bit while he was teaching the sannin, but I mean in a more _'let's check and make sure everyone's safe'_ kind of way." He assured with much hand waving.

The three exchanged a long look before nodding and making general noises of agreement, hoping to placate the flustered man. "So. What do _you_ do?" Kakashi pondered out loud.

"Eh?" Iruka blustered and pointedly riffling through some nearby scrolls. "I'm not…I mean, that's…"

"Ruka-kun throws things." Kotetsu informed plainly, coming back to sit behind the table looking slightly bedraggled.

"He throws things? Like what kind of things?" Genma demanded, looking back and forth between a pinkening Iruka and a tired looking Kotetsu.

"Whatever." Kotetsu replied shrugging with one shoulder. "He's much like a petulant woman in that sen…" He cut off abruptly when a pen rebounded off the side of his head. "See? Ow."

They starred at the normally socially conscious, and well behaved sensei as he picked up the pen and twirled it between his fingers. He cleared his throat as Kotetsu ran soothing fingers through spiky hair. "If you'll excuse me," he began reaching for the overflowing stack of files, and carefully escaping.

Genma managed to hold his laughter until he'd gotten out the door. Kotetsu smiled, tucking a folder into a file box. "He's got spectacular aim. They won't let him pitch in the academy softball games anymore because his handicap got so high. It must be handy, having all those moving targets to hurl erasers at all day. I guess it would put ones skills to the test."

Kakashi rubbed his masked mouth and Asuma chuckled softly. "You'd better watch it," Kotetsu warned "now that you know about it you're all fair game." Genma seemed to find this hilarious and was doubled over, nearly toppling from his perch on the table's edge.

* * *

_AN: I've no beta, not that I've requested or looked for one. Any mistakes or typos are my own and are in want of correction. If they bother you, tell me and I'll fix them. Hope you enjoyed it._


	2. Chapter 2

**For Love or Vice**

**The Profligacy **_of ninja life_

_By the Brass Dragon_

_**Chapter 2; **__Diligence in attestation _

Kakashi tapped the spine of a brightly colored book against his thigh. Obviously word of _'ninja vice'_ had spread. Eyes that had seemed to scoff were now understanding; even pitying. Pacing before a ragged corpse of trees he shoved the offending book into his weapon's pouch. People he'd never spoken to were greeting him; village women weren't averting their eyes as he read in plain public view.

Iruka had flipped his social standing with a simple lecture to two curious genin. The man had great potential. Sighing he rolled a shoulder and tilted his head back to ease a stiff neck; only to pause mid-motion as he caught sight of Sakura creeping tentatively into the clearing. "Sakura?" He asked confused. "Did you forget something?" She'd seemed distracted throughout this morning's training, and had disappeared quickly when he'd dismissed them twenty minutes ago.

"No. Kakashi-sensei…" Her chin quivered and she bit her lip, clearly distressed. "There's something… I need to talk to you about something."

* * *

Iruka looked tired. His hair was loosened, a sagging pony tail flanked by long loose strands. His leaf hiatiate was hanging around his neck, pulled down as his last class had scrambled out the door with screeching giggles and pounding feet.

With a blissful sigh he reclined in his chair and grinned at the boy in front of his desk. "I am _so_ joining your fan club the first chance I get."

Sasuke grinned, shaking his head as he stepped forward and put the large Styrofoam cup of coffee before his former teacher, the paper bag at his side rustling as he set a sandwich and wrapped wedge of very chocolate cake. "I heard a rumor that you started the first years on weapons training today." He informed, filching a still hot crisp from the sandwich's side.

Iruka rubbed his nose. "Is that the reason for all this?" He asked eyeing the spread in disbelief.

Crossing his arms Sasuke leaned against the desk. "No. It's for the tea."

A sweet smile changed Iruka's weary face completely. "Ah, Sasuke, you didn't need to do this. I'll always do what I can for you; I don't expect anything in return."

Fighting very hard not to squirm, a small blush slipped past his defenses. "I know it's expensive." He blurted. "And you used to make it for me in school and…" He faltered looking embarrassed. Fiddling he straightened a fork and napkin. "I never really ever…you know…"

"I know."

Seeming to loose some of his tension, he nodded. When Iruka unearthed another fork and began unwrapping the cake, his lips twitched and he rested his elbows lightly beside newly graded quizzes.

* * *

Kakashi marched into the academy pushing a very distraught Sakura before him, both hands firmly placed on her shoulders. He swiftly maneuvered her around a corner.

"Kakashi?"

Soft rubber soled sandals squeaked to a halt, and he turned sharply and pinned a curious Kurenai with a desperate glare. Sakura's head snapped back from the force and bounced off her sensei's chest.

Jostling some papers in her arms the woman looked back and forth from student to teacher, her brow furrowed. "Sakura-chan? Is something wrong? You look upset."

He could feel it under his hands; the fine trembling that seemed to radiate from the girl's spine, and then, one wet sniffle.

"Oh. Oh my! Sakura…" Kurenai gushed.

Kakashi frantically looked from the woman worriedly biting her lip to the girl, whose eyes were becoming glossy.

"Sweetie…" Kurenai cooed, reaching out.

Kakashi smacked her hand away. "Shut up!" He hissed pleadingly, trying to convey with one wide eye that _'this girl had been simpering and rambling hysterically for the past thirty minutes, and he'd just gotten her to STOP', _before shoving Sakura forward and almost giving into the urge to scream Iruka's name in desperation.

* * *

Sasuke was licking the tines of his fork, eyes half lidded from chocolate induced euphoria when the door was flung open. He was stuck, mouth slightly open, tongue out, and sitting on Iruka's desk while the teacher slowly ate his sandwich.

"Kakashi-sensei?" Iruka asked, setting down his meal and wiping his hands and mouth on a napkin.

Sasuke took one look at his sensei's tense hunched stance and Sakura's trembling lower lip and slid off the desk. "I should be going."

Kakashi nodded thankfully and pushed Sakura into the room.

"Sasuke-kun." Iruka called, opening his desk drawer and pulling out a small cloth wrapped bundle. He tossed it gently into the boy's open hands. "To help you sleep." He said quietly. Sasuke's eyes widened fractionally, and then he nodded and shut the door carefully behind him.

Kakashi nudged Sakura all the way across the room, and eventually made it to Iruka's desk. In turn the man came around and stopped by their side. Not much can slip past a school teacher, and after a few seconds he did something Kakashi didn't expect; he put his hands under Sakura's arms and lifted her to sit on his desk. "Now, what seems to be that matter?"

Sakura blinked rapidly, the urge to let tears spill down her cheeks nearly overwhelming. Breathing in quick short bursts she fought between being the young lady she should be and the little girl she felt like.

"Shh. Shh." He calmed, handing her a napkin. "Blow your nose and tell me what's wrong."

* * *

"_I can't fix it if I know what's broken." Sensei said with a kind smile, moving her bangs carefully out of her eyes and behind her ear. "Where the other kids teasing you again Sakura-chan?"_

_

* * *

  
_

She balled up the dirty napkin and composed herself the best she could. "I don't want to be a ninja." She blurted, biting her lip as Iruka looked at Kakashi and then back.

"Oh?" He handed her another napkin. "Can I ask what changed your mind?"

Sakura squared her shoulders, sniffling once more. "You did Iruka-sensei."

"Oh? How did I do that?" He held up the trash bin and let her toss the soiled napkins in.

"When you told Naruto and I about vices the other night, you made me realize something. Ninja live fast, lonely lives. The last thing I want for myself is an unending sea of missions and the only traces of romance to come from the pages of a book." She cast a quick guilty glance, with an underlay of pure unadulterated pity, at Kakashi. "All jounins seem to be socially stunted and hardly able to interact with anyone below their rank. Marriage seems to be rare, and family even rarer. It's not something I can image for myself; that kind of life." Her rant seemed to trail off dejectedly, and she looked down at her swinging feet sadly.

Iruka was quiet, and Kakashi almost gave into the urge to poke, when he finally spoke. "I'm disappointed in you, I thought you were smarter that that Sakura." Her head swung up and wide shocked eyes fixed on her teacher.

Kakashi blinked and inhaled sharply, _'what the hell…"._

"What?" Sakura whispered.

Holding up a hand he lifted a finger. "If ninja live fast and lonely lives, how do you explain Sandaime or Godaime? Or even Jiraiya and Orochimaru? They've lived more than half a century, or more. That's a full life for even a civilian." Lifting a second finger he tilted his head. "If all jounin are social stunted and can't interact with those below their rank, would they take on genin teams? I'm a chunin, how do you explain my relations with Kakashi-sensei or Genma? Don't Kotetsu, Izumo and I interact with various jounin everyday?"

Sakura blinked, opening her mouth to speak, but only nodding. "As for love, romance, family and such;" he held up a third finger "how do you explain Shikamaru, Ino, Choiji, Shino, Hinata, Kiba, Sasuke…a very large portion of your graduating class?" He demanded in a quiet voice. "They all come from established or even legendary shinobi families. Most of their parents married for the soul reason that they loved each other." Sighing he stepped back and let his hand fall.

"You've focused too much on Kakashi-sensei and his books. You're seeing him as the typical Konohana ninja. He is not typical, and you don't have the means to even consider measuring yourself against him or his skills. Practically no one in Kohona or anywhere else has those means." He smiled, trying to take away the sting of any unintended insult. "You don't _have_ to go any further than you are right now, you could stay a genin for the rest of your life. But I think before you make that choice, you should think about it a little more and maybe open your eyes and take a closer look at the world around you." Stepping up he rested a hand on her shoulder and watched her try to sort through what he had just said.

"It's a lot to think about." Kakashi said softly, catching their attention. "Take your time and be sure the choice you make is right for you."

She nodded, sliding very slowly off the desk. "Yes. Thank you and I'm sorry, if I caused you any trouble." Her apology was broad, and aimed at both men.

Kakashi snorted, and Iruka gave her shoulder another reassuring squeeze. "It's your future. You're supposed to worry about it." She offered them a crooked smile and slowly left the room.

After the door had shut, Iruka groaned and sank to the floor, crumpling and then unfolding; letting his head _'thunk'_ on the worn wood.

"Are you alright?" Kakashi asked, taking a seat by his hip and peering down at him.

"This is too much." He moaned "_'Take a job at the academy' _they told me, _'less stress, no surprises'_ they said. Bullshit." Iruka rambled. "Liars, all of 'em."

"You're bleeding." Kakashi informed, poking lightly at the soiled bandages through a torn shirt sleeve.

"Give the little goblins sharp and pointies, and then try to teach them to make them into projectiles. Little monsters will throw them at each other like it's dodge ball."

"You've lost your hair tie." He picked it up, twirling it in front of his masked face.

Iruka sighed, closing his eyes. "That and any trace of my sanity."

"I wouldn't say that." Kakashi rumbled, amused, tapping Iruka's bare forehead. "You got through to Sakura…" He rubbed his covered mouth in contemplation.

"Did it insult you?" He asked rolling his head to meet Kakashi's eye.

"You seem to care a great deal about what people think of me." His voice was quiet, and questioning. "Why would you care if I were offended or not?"

Blinking up at the copy-nin, he wondered when the conversation had turned to more serious matters. "She wouldn't have meant to offend you. I'm sure you could do without any more of speculation about you and your books."

Kakashi felt his lips curve. "At least you try to find some sort of reason behind it. Anyone else would have just agreed that I was a pervert and been done with it."

"Eh." Iruka scoffed, reaching up to rub his nose. "I don't know how anyone can call you a pervert with Jiraiya and Ebisu around."

"Ah." Kakashi nodded, and then paused. "Ebisu? You're the second person to call him a pervert. What don't I know?"

Iruka flushed and turned his head. "I'd rather not talk about that right now."

He eyed that bright pink blush and imagined ten kinds of embarrassing, compromising situations; placing Iruka in various rolls. And was confused when the images made him uncomfortable and vaguely angry rather than amused. "Right." He stood, unnecessarily brushing himself off before offering a hand to help the other up. "I'll help you clean up and get home." He suggested, pulling Iruka to his feet.

"Thank you." He sighed tilting his head tiredly.

"Mm." Kakashi hummed, unsure of what to do with such gratitude.

* * *

Iruka was confused. He seemed to be caught at an in-between with this strange relationship with Kakashi. 'Friends' seemed to be to intimate a term, but 'acquaintance' was something they'd passed by already. Groaning softly he slumped over the railing of the small balcony. The twisted wrought iron clung to the side of the Hokage's private library.

Not to long before the chunin exams, he'd offhandedly suggested to the sandaime that the entire thing needed reorganizing. So…in addition to the preparations of the exams, his evenings were spent with Saratobi-sensei, elbow deep in dusty decaying scrolls.

When the dust had settled, and the rebuilding had begun and Tsunade-sama had taken her place in the office, he had explained the predicament and pointed out the problems.

She in turn had regarded him curiously, and then raised one elegant brow. "Well, you should get busy then."

Iruka had shown amazing restraint, merely biting the inside of his cheek and mentally re-arranging his schedule. To be fair, the woman had given her consent to all of his suggestions, sometimes showing up to watch him speculatively and poke around the more obscure looking documents.

So when a body slumped heavily against his shoulder and moaned _'slacker'_, he grinned cheekily.

Izumo had volunteered to help out once, and the Hokage had appointed him Iruka's 'assistant'. "We're never going to be done," was bemoaned against Iruka's shoulder "we'll die here. Forever preserved under eons worth of dust and paper."

Chuckling he bumped the man aside gently. "Eh. We'll get done, if Tsunade-sama will let me bust out that wall and use the room next door."

Izumo gazed at him wide eyed. "You're just drunk with power now aren't you?" He sighed dreamily, "Will you ask her if I can have a pony?"

Iruka nodded sagely. "Mm. Of course. Strong, fluffy, and white…with black spots."

Izumo giggled very convincingly and tugged him inside to look at the doomed wall.

* * *

Genma tapped one finger on the tabletop, staring at a flustered looking Kotetsu. "And you can't take my report because…" He drawled.

Sifting uncomfortably behind the desk, he looked pleadingly towards the door. "I don't have that kind of clearance." He protested waving his hands rather frantically. "I just file, and receive general mission requests."

There was a plaintive sigh and a general rumbling of discontent. "And who is supposed to be her that _does _have that clearance?" Ibiki demanded.

"Ah…um… That would be Iruka."

Ibiki stilled, and seemed to flounder for a response. "Oh."

"Sensei's late?" Kiba's voice chimed in from somewhere in the room.

Kakashi looked up from his copy of _'Nin-Weekly'_ and glanced at the clock, shrugging a shoulder he flipped a page.

"_What_ are you _reading_?" Shikamaru demanded in a disapproving tone, eyeing the magazine.

"Shut. Up."

The door slowly slid open, a dirty gray tinged foot shoved it the rest of the way, and Iruka walked slowly to the desk. "Yes?" He asked, turning to face the packed room as he carefully set down a case of scrolls.

"Were you…baking?" Genma asked in an amazed tone.

Iruka blew back a strand of dirty, gray tinged, plaster drenched hair and glared. "Does this honestly _look _like flour to you?" He asked quietly.

Shizune's head peeked through the open door apprehensively. "Iruka-ku…sensei. Your wounds…"

"Are definitely not going to open any time soon." He countered pulling off his headband and rubbing his forehead.

"Yes, of course." She nodded. "But you should get them cleaned up; we have no idea what they used for that plaster."

Sighing heavily he sat and took Genma's report. "Of course Shizune-san, first chance I get." Kotetsu shifted away, and Genma took a step back, neither wanting to be in the line of fire.

"Um." Shizune hid a bit better behind the door. "Tsunade-sama would like to know, um, when her library will be finished." She abruptly disappeared, pulling the door nearly closed in front of her.

The room was eerily still as Iruka took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Of course Shizune-san, first chance I get."

Peeking back into the room she nodded, bowing and backing slowly out of sight. Stamping approval on Genma's report he calmly made not and handed a folder and scroll over to Kotetsu, before just as calmly hurling his pen at a slowly retreating Gemna.

"Ow! Damnit! Why me?" He demanded, sounding upset.

Iruka just smiled sweetly, calling out "Next."

Ibiki cautiously picked the pen up from the floor and warily made his way forward, not at all liking the glare Iruka was giving the tall stack of papers that made up his report.

* * *

The end of his shift found Iruka face down on the mission desk. He was dirty, sore, and very tired. Wrapping an arm around himself he hissed harshly. There were still twenty thousand things he needed to do, and the presence at the door couldn't seem to decide if it actually wanted to enter or not.

Kakashi fiddled at the slightly open door, unsure of how to instigate a potential confrontation. It had been openly discussed just how volatile the man had been today, and he was wary that maybe he had misinterpreted just how friendly the relationship between the two of them had become. Taking a deep steadying breath he stepped in, shutting the door behind him.

"Was there something you needed Kakashi-sensei?" He asked trying not to sound put-upon.

"No."

Iruka sighed and seemed to slump further into the table. "You're not going to throw things at me?" Kakashi asked sounding faintly amused.

Pushing himself up to rest on his elbows, he pinned the copy-nin with a tired glare and frowned. "Are you going to add to my never ending list of things to do?"

Shaking his head in response, Iruka hummed and nodded approvingly. "Do you have a message from the Hokage, Izumo, Shizune…or anyone else for that matter?"

"Nope. No messages." He assured patting his pockets in affirmation.

A sweet, almost goofy smile spread across Iruka's face. "Are you Genma? Under a henge?"

Kakashi started, one blue eye widening in surprise. "No, not the last time I checked."

Iruka nodded, stretching out his arms and muttering a half hearted _'kai'_ before letting his head rest on the table again. "Okay. Common in…pull up a chair."

Kakashi grinned, shaking his head and made his way to the desk for his _coup de gras;_ a large Styrofoam coffee cup, that he set on the table before the tired sensei's nose.

Iruka relaxed and graced Kakashi with an honest-to-goodness grateful smile. "You are a god of a man, I promise to build a shrine and start a Church of Hakate as soon as I find some time to print up the flyers."

The masked face twisted with good natured mirth. "You do that. I can't take all the credit though. I ran into Sasuke outside, he picked it up for you."

Grinning as he pushed himself back up into a sitting position, still dirty hands carefully pried the plastic lid off the cup. "Such a sweet, well mannered, gem of a boy." He sighed, "I'm all for shoving him up on that golden pedestal. Yes, those countless starry eyed school girls and dirty old men were right all along."

Kakashi sputtered and then erupted into rough laughter. "You do understand that you fall more into the later category, right?" He laughed all the more when Iruka's only response was to sigh mournfully and nod. Leaning back in his chair he grinned and regarded the man before him. "So. What happened?"

Flushing faintly, Iruka brought the cup to his lips. "A ceiling fell on me."

At Kakashi's incredulous gaze he proceeded to tell the tale of Izumo, a justu, and the woe begotten wall that had, indeed, been load bearing.

* * *

_And so ends our tale. There is a bit about how the ceiling fell, and Iruka's resulting temper tantrum; but it doesn't really flow so that may just be a little drabble for later. _

_You wouldn't believe the pieces of stories I have buried in notebooks, hidden within class notes and seminar doodles. I have the feeling that this story was an offshoot for more; I found an Iruka and Tsunade conversation in a biology folder…and a Iruka flashback about a chunin exam in Wave. They all have chunks of something familiar, the torn up library, things thrown, and this strange all knowing Iruka. Seriously, how does no one in this village know each other? In the manga no one has met anyone else, no one seems to know _about _anyone else…_


End file.
